This game stands with Golgo-13 as the one of the only licensed games that fought the power (of the Nintendo Seal of Quality/Censorship)! Yeah! Down with the man, Guerrilla War style! Go Che!

From NintendoGuru, Seph-X, BrandonTCA, BarrelO, and UkaHawa; all equipped with something bionic that most certainly isn't an arm...

More from Urte McBeat's exploding head

"What, you're going to fight against me? You damn fool"

Pretty heavy stuff, eh? The intro. Basically, they replace "Nazis" with "Badds" (uhh...) and make Bionic Commando a continuation of Commando, a game which it really has no relation to. Oh Nintendo! You wacky censors!

Say what?

Such foul language! | "Advance with caution."

It is a definite possibility

Finally, I beat the game, and here's the quotes

This guy's a little excited about blowing up his own stuff | And I didn't even have to ask him | That's because they've got the right hairdresser | This must be some alternate universe because I'm actually getting a bazooka | This is what I'd scream if I had just launched a rocket into the cockpit of Hitler's helicopter | I think I got that impression from his heavy armament | Super Joe finishes the tale of the Bionic Commando

Whew, good thing it's not going to EXPLODE. Jesus, I would've been worried then. | Uh, hi Hal.

And now the ending to the VERY shitty arcade version.

You know, this is why Hitler is the big boss and this guy is only the worthless pawn. At least Hitler could make a good speech. | Damn sodomy laws

Thanks, Bionic Commando! But the real Joe's in another castle! | HAL'S A LOOSE CANNON! GET HIM OFF THE CASE! | You see, Capcom's really brilliant when it comes to cross-promotion. Here, about five YEARS before Captain Commando gets released, a cameo appearance is made by Baby Head! | That's right. If you EVER want to get anywhere in the military hierarchy, you better DAMN WELL know where your garbage dump is! | You know, when I envision a giant killer Nazi Badd robot coming after me, it REALLY destroys the fear it's supposed to instill when it's first words are "Pi Pi Pi" | And if I knew what the hell that was supposed to be, I'd thank you. | No, I don't. Especially since I can't tell what the fuck that letter's supposed to be.