Alf. They made a damn Alf game. Dear God. I feel like I've been wrenched through time back into the darkest hour of the eighties, watching a stupid puppet make stupid jokes and trying to eat a cat or something. HELP.

From Adam, who had "no problemo" getting these quotes! Ha ha! Actually, he probably nearly died trying to do this, and we salute him.

Ha ha! Observational humor! Funny! Shut the hell up, Alf! | You're certainly not hardcore rip the system punk rock, are you Alf? Oh, I know, you're a part of the government Area 51 alien conspiracy, so you're a member of the illuminati and all that and actually place those fascist rules and stuff. Still, aren't you Illuminati types allowed to brainwash women into servicing you and to kill dissidents and things like that? Can't you just bend the damn rules and swim without a suit? | Alfer is the worst nickname ever