You know, darkness really gets a bad rap in video games. Sure, horrible scythe-handed beasts may lurk in the dark waiting to feast on the flesh of virgins, but did you know that darkness also provides comforting shade on a sunny day? That dark chocolate is a taste that many have grown to love? That the Samurai Pizza Cats were darker than dirt, and if you step on their tails, then you're going to get hurt? I say we band together, friends, and protest the gross mistreatment of darkness in video games!

From Badman, tall and dark, but the handsome is debatable

Beware the GATE OF DOOM! | Alas, poor crappy Data East game. I knew it well, Horatio | A menagerie of morons | So why did you let her go out, you dumb schmuck? Don't you know that ALL PRINCESSES WHO LEAVE THE CASTLE WILL GET KIDNAPPED 100% OF THE TIME. At least she gets a respectable 40% chance of not getting kidnapped holed up in the castle | Threatening as the dude from Magician Lord? I think not. | Wow, it's like Kool-Aid points! Kill 3 and get a Kool-Aid Atari game! | There's a major semantic difference between hindering and defeating, chummers | He must be getting desperate, calling you "annoying" | Okay, you can be evil, but do you have to be wasteful? It's bad for the environment, and evil people have to live here too! | I think he's just bullshitting now | I just failed, why not get someone more competent than me? Shouldn't you have a waiting list full of resumes of heroes looking for fortune and babes? | NOT THE GATE OF DOOM! I'm scared! | So, does he have an NES controller on his belt? Can he kill things with his zapper? Is he flanked by an entourage of idiot game characters that make gamefans cringe? Then he truly is the GAME MASTER! | This sounds like some fundies going off about THE WICKEDNESS OF THE WORLD!!!11!!1 | Now is time to scramble, uh, heroes again | PRESS! Did you hear that! PRESS! It's urgent! |