Despite the name, you don't really need a brain to get through this game. All you really need is an ass to sit on for countless hours and a knee to smash your controller on when you hit your breaking point from all the mindless drivel dialog.

I wouldn't drink anything this retarded bartender made if you paid me | I wonder what this guy's weapon of choice is? | It's totally sexy! | Yes, this plaque is blank, even though YOU CAN SEE THE DAMN LINES ON THE GRAPHIC | Yes, your shopkeeping skills will save us all! | Nonono, I said SELL, retard | What a coincidence! That's why I came there! | Why does this colloseum guy refer to the fights as "Cards"? | Most people end sentences with periods, not stupid lines | But is it Dark? | Blood makes me feel all tingly inside! | Right, thanks.. | THAT'S your best reason for attacking?? | Well I was going to answer you until you called me gay | At long last, the truth about maturing Fairy Balls! | Well if it isn't the Fairy Balls researcher | To clear this one up, Rein is a GUY | Thanks for saying it like a question. Makes me feel even sexier | Wow! I didn't even USE it yet! | Barness is so old that he forgets letters every now and then | This guy acts as the towns thermometer | Okay Dragon, what's with the line? Are we playing Mad Libs? | AND I AM MIGHTY WARRIOR! | This inn-keeper is master of small-talk | Not even the fairy-naming screens are safe from crappy grammar | Geez.. ya THINK?! | Kashian has the attention span of a gnat |This billboard makes no frigging sense at all | Heheh.. sexual innuendo! | That's not funny | This plaque just baffles the hell out of me | Well no wonder she ran away, with everyone making fun of her personality | Prize is too small! | Rotting usually makes books hard to read.. | Damn, I wanted to see some weak-ass people duke it out | I don't care HOW polite you are, we aren't waiting anymore! | And this was a secret why? | I wouldn't put the most retarded person in town in charge of the main gate.. | That's more of a question, old timer | Rein also loses the concept of a "question"

The retarded shopkeepers of Brain Lord: From blunt as hell... | ...to condescending jerks... | ...to complete ass-kissers

Some of the great items of the game: Looking at this armor makes you forget how to use commas | Rocks AND stones? Wow, this thing's DAMN NEAR INVINCIBLE! | Oh great, like I'm going to wear that on my head NOW

And finally, the great Keys of Brain Lord! How the hell do you CARRY an Endless Key? | What, this key has a body? | BUT HOW?!?! | I guess that looking at this key causes you to have stupidly profound visions | Oh thanks, that's reassuring | This key just doesn't make ANY damn sense | What the hell do goblins have to do with it?